Sunday, July 29, 2012

Chemo #3

Good Evening all,

We had a wonderful weekend even though it started out rocky on Friday.  Friday was chemo #3 and meeting with Dr. Hantel.  It started on Thursday evening, after having a great week, towards the end of my work day, I was dreading going home and to my appointment on Friday.  Yes, I still cried almost every day, but I felt in control and was happy the majority of the week, until Thursday evening.  I knew I had not felt much of a change in the tumor size and I was getting scared to go on Friday and the anxiety just took over me.  I prayed a lot on Thursday that I could ask the hard questions and get through the appointment.

Friday, we first met with a genetic counselor.  Most of the information she gave us was already discussed with us through Dr. Hantel and the Dr. at Northwestern.  They are going to do testing on the BRCA gene 1 and 2.  If I am a carrier of the scarier one, I will not only need a mastectomy, but probably a hysterectomy will be in my near future.  This does not worry me, I am all for removing whatever is necessary to put this behind me once and for all.  I think I surprise them all when I don't flinch with these big decisions.  But I have a wonderful supportive husband and 2 wonderful children.  Take it!

Then was the dreaded meet with Dr. Hantel.  He and I both agreed there was not much change if any in the tumor size.  He decided with cycle #3 of the previous chemo concoction, but we came up with a plan.  If this cycle there is still not much change, we will skip cycle 4 of the current concoction and move on to a weekly regiment instead of bi-weekly.  1 week will be 1 drug and a 2nd drug added in every other week.  This will prolong chemo an extra 4 weeks putting the surgery off as well.  He still said the next set of drugs should be easier on my blood counts, but obviously chemo every week will cause the dreaded fatigue.  

Even after this discussion, I had the strength and courage to ask some tough questions.  1.  Should I be staying as active as I currently am: working, kids, home life, etc?  His answer was still yes.  2.  How do we guarantee if we aren't seeing results this is not spreading?  He still is confident the drug is working, just not enough, so is not concerned.  3.  Why not just skip to surgery?  I knew the answer, to ensure they get it all, they need this tumor to shrink.  I just needed to hear this again, even though it hurts to hear every time.  4.  My emotions.  This last chemo really played a number on my emotions.  I'm hoping it had a lot to do with the hair loss.  He really put it into perspective....Cancer is a life changing event (DUH) but not only am I going through that, I am going through raising 2 young children, 1 being only 4 months old and some of the emotions could be chalked up to postpartum.  On top of that, a majority of you know, my company is relocating in June of 2013.  So even though my work is being highly supportive and WONDERFUL, it still is on our mind....Moving and keeping my wonderful job, staying and losing a wonderful job and eventually losing insurance and trying to find a new full time job.  Pretty scary stuff!  So talking this out with him, really helped a lot and made me realize, this roller coaster of emotions is expected and probably won't go away anytime soon.  

Chemo was uneventful.  Friday evening, Don and Justin headed up to my in-laws lake house.  Whitney, Ryan and I stayed back so I could get my shot on Saturday morning.  After my shot, we headed up and it was great for all of us.  Whitney enjoyed a relaxing break while my mother in law stepped in with Ryan and Justin played with the neighbors grand son who is 10 months younger than him.  They really get a long well and I just relaxed and had a chance to catch up with Justin some and enjoyed watching him play with his friend.  

Today I have felt good still.  A little on the tired side, but that is to be expected.  I still agree that the new anti-nausea drugs are way better than cycle 1.  I did get a nap in and kind of wonder if the nap makes me a little more tired and cranky than before.  My patience are short and I hate that!!!

So this week and next, it is important that this tumor gets the hint and starts to shrink.  I still have faith that it will and we won't have to move to the weekly treatments.  I think my body is just a little slow to get the hint.  But I do need extra prayers for this to shrink.  Also for my strength and emotions to stay in tact this week and next.  And of course for my family members who are enduring just as much stress as I am through this.  So I have a lot to ask with this blog!  

Have a great week.  I am off to eat some dinner and give baths to a sandy little boy named Justin!

Lots of Love,

Amber

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Weekend Update

Good Sunday Afternoon,

This has been a great weekend!  This weekend was just what I needed to realize I had a bad week last week, but that is behind me now.  I'm hoping based off of my mood since yesterday, my levels are recovering and I'm on the "mend" until chemo #3 on Friday.  

Friday I had every intentions of leaving work a little early to start my weekend.  The week was really rough and that day just things were not happening for me.  After lunch with some good pals and just laughing and then coming back and getting involved with some work things, the next thing I knew it was 5:30! I came home and still had energy.  Whitney, Don and I watched a hilarious movie after the kids were asleep (Wonderlust).....Friends, I almost made it the entire movie!  Most of you know I take after my mom in the movie front, I usually don't get past the opener on a good day!  

Saturday my best friends from grade school, Lisa and Megan came to visit.  We realized it had been way too long since we had seen each other, but they were just what I needed!  A little background about these girls: Lisa, Megan and I have all been friends since probably about 2nd grade for Lisa, but pre-school for Meg and I.  During our grade school days we usually played fairly well together, but high school was a different story!  We had a BLAST!  I don't have their permission to share a lot of the stories, so I won't. We weren't always using the best common sense when we were together and probably scared our parents to death at times, but when we were together, I have to admit, I think outsiders were jealous of our good times:) We have not seen each other in awhile, but we all 3 still communicate fairly regularly by phone.  

I had asked Megan to do the duties of shaving my head.  Megan's mom used to have a salon in their home and growing up, I would always think it was a good idea to let Megan cut my hair before a night out on the town.  Usually I would wake up the next day and realize just because her mom has a beauty salon does not mean Megan is a licensed cosmetologist.  But again, in the moment, it was a great idea!  So who better to shave my head??  Megan trimmed it short and prepared me, but Lisa and Megan decided Lisa was better fit for the shaving part because she shaves her husband Jeff's head.  All of you that know both Lisa and Megan are probably shrieking at the thought of me being brave enough to have Lisa do this!  By no means is this a knock against Lisa, but of the 3 of us girls, Lisa and I sometimes don't know when to stop joking and take life serious and the shaving of my head you would think I would try to take as serious as possible....No, having her do it, made me realize it didn't have to be serious, it just needs to be added as another moment that we can later in life look back and laugh at.  Lisa shaved while Megan rocked Ryan to sleep and continued to reassure me that Lisa was not giving me Mohawk or writing inappropriate messages into what was left of my hair!  She did an awesome job.  They both did....They were just what I needed for this!  I love them both like sisters.  So both of you thank you and get back up here soon!  

Don took Justin to the NASCAR event last night and again today so today it has really just been Whitney, Ryan and I.  We started our day with church and then have just hung out.  Ryan was a good napper today so even Whitney and I got a small nap in.  Justin and Don should be home from the track soon.  It makes me so happy to see Justin so happy!  He just loves NASCAR.  Don and I continue to learn as we go since neither of us know a lot about the sport, but he tells us everything we need to know about it and then some!  Whatever it takes to make him smile and be happy! 

Here is to hoping this week is a good week.  Friday we are meeting with a genetic counselor for tests in the morning and then chemo in the afternoon.  As much as I look forward to chemo because it is making me better, I also dread it.  It means starting the cycle of not knowing how I will feel physically and emotionally, scared to see the Dr. afraid they will tell me something bad or that they won't be happy with the results so far, just a whirlwind of worries that I am trying to block out until Friday.....Minute by minute day by day.  I can't let this worry take over my days!  I need and want more days like yesterday and today and this week, that is what I will concentrate on.  I need all of your help to do that.

Lots of Love!

Amber


Thursday, July 19, 2012

My Boys

Nothing much to update right now, so I guess that is a good thing!  Still feeling for the most part good after my treatment last Friday.  I can tell my levels are dropping as I have been feeling more tired and my nose is starting to run.  I'm like my little boys these days, I constantly have to keep Puffs by me!  

My only big update is my hair!  I knew it would happen and I have to say it was not as hard as I thought, but I am still dealing with it daily.  Trying to find the exact style I like.  Nothing compares to having a full head of hair, but my turbans have been what I feel best in these days.  I still have not had it shaved, but I look ridiculous without covering it so I will spare everyone the details!  Justin has his  favorite turban / wrap and I am not sure how to break it to him, but it is not one of mine.  He likes it because it has a flower that attaches to it.  I wore it the other day and it really put me in a bad mood:(  It could have just been an off day, but I am blaming it on a bad "hair" day.  I think I can work the flower in somewhere else for him to keep him happy.

Speaking of my Justin, he is doing so good.  I know he has heard and probably understands more than Don and I are willing to admit.  We knew before all of this how smart he was, but he asks questions and is overly concerned with small things these days and I know deep down, the poor little boy probably has a lot on his mind and doesn't know how to express himself.  The other day I told him not to worry about things that we are "minute by minute, day by day."  Justin repeated the phrase over and over and I honestly think it is helping.  He is like me and has always been overly worried about things.  Our minds wonder and I know exactly how he must feel.  I know he does not understand how nasty cancer is because he is 5, but this past month, he has seen his mommy cry, go to bed early, get frustrated and now lose her hair.  All he has handled the best any 5 year old can.  He has asked what is wrong and rubbed my back, came to get in bed early with me, asked me not to yell or say bad words (yes, there was 1 time that I cussed on accident in front of him.....do not judge:) and he has supported my hat / turban wearing!  He is the best little boy and I am so proud of him!  But I do need prayers and that we are doing everything we are supposed to for him and will take any advise that anyone may have.  We have some lists of counseling classes where he is shadowed and we are taking him to church, but we are taking feedback!

Little Ryan is just the best these days too!  What a happy little boy.  He just smiles and melts my heart.   Before I was diagnosed, I used to look forward to the midnight feedings with him, because that was our quiet time together.  Working full time, after bath and dinner, Ryan was falling asleep so I liked when he would wake up to eat because I rock him and just stare at my beautiful angel.  I am missing those feedings these days but I know I have to take care of myself and being such a good baby and having awesome family, he is getting what he needs and wants.... a bottle, fresh diaper and back to bed.  So I have to let others do this, I just miss that time and know when I am better, he will (better be) sleeping through the night.  So I won't get these days back.  But what he doesn't know won't hurt him.  He is in great hands!  He is getting 3 teeth and is rolling like crazy!  I can tell you that he is going to be quick to do everything!  He wants to be involved in all of the action with his big brother!  I am so blessed for my boys.

Lets not forget about Don.  I  do not doubt that this is probably at times harder on him.  There are no words that can make me feel better at times, there is not enough he can do or say to keep my spirits up and I know that it is so frustrating and probably hard to be around me at times.    Especially because most of you reading this know that I'm the one usually cracking the one liners and making sure we are all laughing.  I want and look forward to the day that I can go back to that. Until then, I must remind him for better or worse:)  I know he loves me and will keep me around, but I know he wants things to get back to normal just as quickly as I do.  He is a great daddy to our boys and has shown extra patience and has really stepped in and took over to make sure we are all cared for and are all getting the extra attention we need. 

So for this post, I ask for thoughts and prayers for my 3 boys.  I also of course ask for the continued prayer that this stupid tumor continues to shrink and lastly for good days!  This is so exhausting and I still can not get through the day without a coughing away the lump in my throat or just letting it out and just crying!  I know this is all normal and I know I am doing the best that I can so what else can I ask for, right?  I know I'm blessed with the best family, friends, neighbors, co-workers etc.  just prayers and continued support is what we need!

Lots of Love,

Amber

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Sunday Update

Well friends and family, today is day 3 after treatment.....I'm supposed to feel sick and tired and spend my day in bed like I did 2 weeks ago....so far so good.  I'm taking a different anti-nausea medicine and so far I am not anxious, jittery or groggy like last time.  Steroids have kicked in and I have an appetite like no ones business.  Dr Hantel said that is normal and he isn't concerned and that I actually lost a couple of pounds from 2 weeks ago.  


Friday's chemo was uneventful.  The port made everything so much easier.  Dr. Montana did a great job.  I have only seen one other person's port, so I don't have a lot to compare to, but I think mine looks great.  Not very noticeable.  The worst is rocking Ryan to sleep because it is still sore.  Hopefully as time goes by, that will go away.  


Dr. Hantel, Don and I discussed some concerns I was having through out the week.  Mainly involving the port placement at the hospital.  I am not out to knock nurses, so please do not get me wrong, but I have learned VERY quickly, I have to have my game face on at all times and not every nurse is compassionate, concerned or up to date on what they are doing.  I unfortunately had 3 of those nurses on Monday for my port placement.  These are not Cancer Center nurses so I am still comfortable getting treatment at the Cancer Center, but it was one thing after another.  First they had not read my chart so they were under the assumption I was having the port placed after a mastectomy.  After I corrected them, instead of stepping back to read my chart, they tried to cover up that they knew I didn't have surgery, but that they were concerned with my lymph node removal.....Nope, didn't have that either.  Finally I had to speak up and voice my concern!  I got through, but I was very uncomfortable.  So nurses out there, I know for the most part, you care deeply about your jobs, but talk to your nursing buddies and make sure all are like the ones I know!  This was very scary to me and in my opinion, all it took was reading up on a chart....Something I have noticed over and over since I had Ryan.  YOU MUST look at everything and take your patients serious.  So scary!


Dr. Hantel did not feel that the tumor had shrunk, but felt that it was softer.  He also told me something I wish he didn't, he felt that from my consultation on the 22nd to my first treatment on the 29th, the tumor had actually grown.  So what we are looking for his shrinkage of this tumor within the next 2 weeks!  Please pray that this happens.  This scares me and I try to block it out because I know for a fact I will beat this, but I need to see results!  So please help me pray for the tumor to shrink!  


Friday evening Whitney and Lauren took me to a hair dresser (Julie).  I intended on getting rid of my hair or at least cutting it very short.  Julie had us over to her gorgeous house and made me feel so good about myself.  My hair I think was shy for her and did not shed like it had that morning.  So we just trimmed it up and agreed that I would come back to her shop as I needed more taken off.  Unfortunately yesterday and today have proven that I probably should have bit the bullet and cut it short.  It is ridiculous!  What worries me more is the shedding and my kids getting it wrapped around extremities or in their mouth.  My poor vacuum!  Whitney and I just sit and stare at it.  Because it is so thick, I have not noticed bald spots, but I don't know how much more I can take!  So Julie, I hope you may have room for me this week!


Yesterday our house was filled with great company.  I felt great and was thinking it was the calm before the storm, I cleaned some, did a ton of laundry and organized Ryan's closet.  He is growing so quickly and I needed to purge the smaller clothes!  My dear mother in law, Wendy, came over and grocery shopped for us.  In the afternoon Don's cousin and his wife, Ronnie and Kathy came by.  Later that night some great friends brought us dinner.  Awesome company!  Thank you to the Strobels.  We can't thank every one enough for the continued support and helpfulness!  WOW, it is amazing!  


Today has been a lazy day.  We went to church, which felt awesome.  Then Wendy took Ryan and Don took Justin to a festival.  Whitney is working on a research paper and I napped some.  Then Whitney and I organized some billing stuff and appointment information.  It has been a good day for the most part.


What I ask, is for everyone to please not give up the prayers for us.  I know you won't, but I need them.  I need the prayers to stay focused, for strength to keep up with my many hats that I am forced to wear and most of all for this tumor to start to shrink!


Love to all!


Amber



Thursday, July 12, 2012

Day 13

Well, today was the day I have been warned about for the past 2 weeks.....Most women will lose their hair completely 13 days after their first treatment.  Doctors, friends, fighters, survivors.  All have warmed me about this day!!  While I'm shedding quickly, I think my thick hair is saving my butt these days!  I am heavily anxious about the day that it will be gone and am hoping that the day it happens the build up to it will be the worst part!  Wish me luck or stay out of my way:)  


Today has probably been the best day since "D" day!  I have been full of jokes and quite honestly cracking myself and others up all day.  If I found out someone has laughed out of pity, I'm going to be highly irritated!  


The port has been installed and several have asked about the name Michael Bolton.  There really isn't a great story behind it.  Somewhat from the movie Office Space and the character Michael Bolton and somewhat about the highly annoying signer Michael Bolton.  Never thought about it, but even if I'm bald I'll have better hair than him!  The surgery was quick and painless and I thank Dr. Montana afterwards for the best nap ever.  He informed me I chatted through the entire surgery.  I asked what I was saying and he just shook his head and said he couldn't understand me because of the mask.  I think he is lying....I like to think I talked to him about my 2nd opinion at Northwestern.  Patient Doctor confidentiality probably will work in my favor!


The 2nd opinion went over well.  Don and I have decided we will stay at Edwards as far as the chemo process goes.  What we have learned is there is a pretty set chemo regiment and we are on the right path.  We will decide closer to time whether to go through Edwards or Northwestern for the surgery part.  Both surgeons have been great, it will just come down to what we decide we are comfortable with closer to that time.  


Next topic, there have been several things that have happened this week that I feel have happened just at the time when I need them to.  I was sharing them with Whitney this afternoon and we decided all are "blog-worthy".  So I wanted to share a few:


1.  A good high school and college friend unfortunately lost her son Evan when he was only a day old last May.  Thanks to Facebook, we have stayed in contact and I have prayed many times for her and her family.  Losing a baby is something I struggle to understand.  Megan is a strong women and is doing wonderfully with her healing and speaking about Evan.  When she found out I was diagnosed, she sent me a prayer card that a nurse had given her when Evan passed away.  She explained that I needed it now and she wanted to pass it along.  The day of my CT and bone scan, I had about an hour and a half in between tests.  Don needed to run to his office for some things and I was afraid with traffic it would be cutting it close if I went with him so I decided to stay back at the hospital.  It was one of those unbearably hot days and I had worn a master piece outfit to the hospital that day (Horrible blue Adidas shorts and a teal tank top)  I was freezing so I found the first exit and went to sit out in one of the many serenity gardens at Edwards hospital.  I sat down and took out the prayer card and read that and then prayed for myself and baby Evan.  When I was done I looked at a plaque in the garden I was in and it read: "This garden is dedicated to angel babies".  Out of all gardens, this is the one that i was led to this day.  Thank you Megan for the prayer card.  It is in my purse and travels everywhere with me right now.


2.  The song "Home" by Phillip Phillips.  Don and I were driving to my surgery on Monday to get Michael Bolton and this song came on.  It was at the time in our car ride where I sit quietly and Don tries to fill the silence with anything to get my mind off of where we are going or what is going on and I can't concentrate and feel like any minute I am going to burst out in tears or cuss like hell!  It has a great tune to it, but the words were what I needed.  It talks about not being alone and not letting the demons fill you with fear.  I downloaded it right then and there and it has become my new favorite.  Check it out!


3.  The port installation....When they wheeled me into the OR the surgeon was listening to music and I happen to remember what song was playing before I nodded off to sleep....Three Days Grace "I hate everything about you".  I don't hate anything about anyone, but I hate everything about Cancer so I found it fitting for the moment.


4.  Lastly, tonight Whitney and I took both of my boys for their well check ups.  Ryan needed 4 month shots and Justin needed shots for Kindergarten.  After this I needed to spoil Justin so we went for ice cream at Ranch Frosty.  After we got our ice cream I noticed a sign on the window there that said tonight 10% of every sale was being donated to the American Cancer Society.  WOW!  How cool is that!!!  


Tomorrow is chemo #2.  I dread it, but look forward to it.  One more down!  I again can not thank you all enough for all of the prayers and support.  Here's to having more days like today!  


Lots of Love,


Amber


P.S. A lot of people have asked so I wanted to share.  My dearest friends Lisa and Megan have designed 4 T-shirts.  You all know it is hard for me to ask for things and it isn't about the money, but they are pretty cool T-shirts.  If you are interested, she is selling through the 16th and then has to close her order.  The web address is: http://www.promoplace.com/37589/stores/amber  You can also link to it from my Facebook.



Sunday, July 8, 2012

Living Guardian Angel

This post may be out of order and long, so please let me apologize first!


What a great weekend we had!  Friday, my parents and sisters left with all of the kids and headed to Watseka IL to visit with my dad's side of the family.  Don and I went to Northwestern and met with a surgeon and then met up with them later in the day.  I must brag that 2 of those family members are breast cancer survivors!  Congratulations to both my Grandma Garrison and Aunt Marilyn!  


Next we drove to Lafayette IN and spent the weekend celebrating my Grandma Freeland's 90th birthday.  WOW!  That is a milestone and you would never know she was 90!  She still lives on her own, and is smart as can be.  My grandmother has 8 kids, 5 daughter / son in laws, 14 grand kids, 7 grand kid in laws and 22 great grand kids!  I sure hope I have this right....feel free to correct me if I have missed something!


Grandma Freeland has been very special to me my entire life, when we were driving back today, I had some time to think about just how special she is to me and how much she has recently helped me! A memory book was made for my Grandma yesterday.  Several months ago, each grand kid was asked to give 1 word to explain Grandma Freeland.  I of course didn't play by the rules and gave a 2 word adjective and I think I gave several different words, but the one that came the quickest to me was she is my Living Guardian Angel.  That is what she is to me!  I love you Grandma!!  I probably can not thank you enough for all of your continued prayers and support! 


Almost exactly a year to go to date, Don and I found out we were pregnant with Ryan.  That day came with A LOT of joy, but also a lot of concern!  Most do not know and probably would never know unless I started to open up like I have with this, I had a miscarriage a year before I became pregnant with Ryan.  It then took us a year to become pregnant with Ryan.  During that time, because it was taking longer, we did a lot of behind the scene testing.  The week before I found out I was pregnant, the Dr. told me my levels were out of control and that we would probably require further fertility assistance to become pregnant.  Don and I were not prepared to move forward at that time and were going to just give it some more time and think about it. The last thing we wanted was to become pregnant with multiples.....Multiples ARE NOT bad, but they are not for us!!


Fast forward one week and SURPRISE! I found out I was pregnant.  The next 2 days went from joy to concern.  The Dr. ran blood work and my results discovered that I have a blood clotting disorder which may have caused the miscarriage the year before.  They immediately wanted me checked twice weekly and I was started on extra Folic Acid because what I have is also linked to issues with the way the body absorbs folic acid and can cause defects with the baby and on top of it, the blood clotting issue could cause my body to cut off the supply of blood to my baby.  So this called for me to give myself a shot a day in the stomach of a blood thinner and a daily baby aspirin.  I was so scared!  And the Dr. were not positive that I would get out of my first trimester.  They did the best they could to prepare me if I lost him and what to do if certain things happened.   This was so scary and sad to me as I had been through a miscarriage and knew the pain and anguish it causes and was not prepared to go through that again.  


During this difficult time, I needed Grandma Freeland.  Grandma was always known to have a direct connection with the man upstairs and there were many times when my mom would tell me something difficult someone else was going through and I would always tell her to call Grandma because Grandma would make sure they were taken care of.  What I did next was call my mom and asked that  she call Grandma Freeland to get her praying for me and the baby!  She did just that.  She prayed so much for us!!  Finally in November, well out of my first trimester and after having a 20 week ultra sound and finding out we were having a boy and he was PERFECT, Grandma asked me if she could put some others in front of me on her prayer list.  I agreed it was time for her to put others in front of us that we were going to be okay and that her prayers had helped! 


Our little blessing was born on time, with mom and baby having no complications!  which leads to my next thought....Don and I and the Dr. are pretty sure this cancer was possibly growing before I became pregnant with Ryan.  We can not help but wonder what if they would have discovered it while I was newly pregnant or later in the pregnancy.  Would Ryan be with us at all or would he have had to be delivered prematurely for me to start treatment.....We could have been faced with a lot more than I think I could have handled.  Ryan is a blessing who helped us find this nasty disease but I think the saying "God will never give you more than you can handle" is right.  I am far from thankful for this stupid cancer, but I am thankful that we discovered it the way we did.  


This June, Unfortunately Grandma Freeland came to my rescue again!   When we were waiting for my biopsy results Grandma was praying away the bad.  Unfortunately we got the unwanted news of cancer.  After the biopsy results I asked mom to call Grandma so she could change what she was praying for.  I know this is not the call my mom wanted to make to Grandma and nor did I want her to have to tell her that her granddaughter was fighting cancer, but I needed her to change her prayers!  Grandma then started praying for my bone and CT Scans and my strength.  I know this was a lot on her!  She had me added to many prayer lists because she needed to make sure he understood how important it was that the worst news was behind us.  Last Friday night I was strong enough to call her myself to let her know her prayers were answered and that the cancer was contained.  She and I were both so relieved!  When she told me how much sleep she had lost, I felt so bad.  Here I am expecting so much from my 90 year old Grandma!  But she knows just what to do and what to say and has made sure that I am added to every prayer list possible to get the word out to help me fight this!!


I am just as appreciative to everyone out there praying and supporting us and wish I had the time and energy to write about everyone, but I needed to plug my grandma!  She is one special lady and I wish everyone reading this could meet her!  I love you Grandma!!


Having the port placed tomorrow if my counts are up enough.  They were low on Friday, which is to be expected, but they will re-test tomorrow morning before the surgery.  Please pray for high enough levels so we can have this done.  After that, nothing until Friday.  Round 2 of Chemo!  YUCK but YAY for getting another one behind me.  I am dreading the feelings of tiredness again since I finally feel like "Amber" again, but it is what we have to do!!


Love to all!


Amber



Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Quiet Time

It has been a while since my last update.  The Naughton household has been very busy!  It has been nice to have my entire family here to help out with meals, baths, cleaning (lack there of with 4 little boys in the house) etc.  We won't know what to do with ourselves next week, but we do know there are more helping hands waiting to step in and we appreciate that!  


My hair is still holding strong....Slowly but surely it is shedding!  Lauren helped me get a couple of wigs last Friday after treatment and a wonderful family friend has also put me in touch with a relative who has graciously agreed to send me a few wigs to try out.  I have also ordered a couple turbans from Etsy through a wonderful women who has been more than helpful!  I have also informed her that since I like to think I'm cute, I could model the turbans for her when I lose my hair to help with her website on Etsy:)  So maybe I'll modeling going for me in my near future:)  HA!  But if I can help someone else, I would love to do that!  


The Dr. were right when they said day 3 & 4 after Chemo are the worst!  That would have been my Sunday and Monday.  Sunday I spent a majority of my day in bed.  I was so tired!  I just could not stay awake.  It was hard on me because I missed some time with my boys and also with my family, but I have to listen to my body and I needed the rest.  Monday seemed a little better.  I did make it through a full day of work, which was nice.  Hopefully my work friends would agree that I did okay.  I was a little groggy from the nausea medicine and the lights in the office kind of bothered me, but I like to think I did okay.  I appreciate all of my work friends letting me come to work to work and have a feeling of NORMALCY!  It is still hard to get through the days, but keeping busy has helped!  So thank you!


Today seemed much better!  I have not had any anti-nausea medicine since 3am this morning.  So I feel more alert and more like myself.  Plus it is almost 9pm and I'm still awake!  Well, 1/2 awake!  So hopefully the days are better here on out!  I know it will hit again after my next treatment, but I'm hoping now I kind of know what to expect which will make it a little easier to manage and will help Don and I know when and where we need the help during those rough few days!


Tomorrow will be a nice day to spend with my family for the 4th.  We plan to head to The Goodnight's for a little pool time.  Thank you so much Goodnight family and we hope to leave the "P" out of the "ool" tomorrow:)  Then tomorrow night we can hopefully watch some fireworks around home before it is back to the office on Thursday for me.


Friday I will have my labs drawn before we head to the 2nd opinion at Northwestern with a surgeon.  My levels need to be up so that I can have my port placed on Monday.  So please pray for that!  Next week we will have the port placed Monday, 2nd opinion with an Oncologist at Northwestern on Wednesday and then another chemo next Friday.  


Please continue to pray not only for my health, but also for my family.  This is not hard on only me, it is hard on all of us and the added love, prayers and support are greatly appreciated and we continue to feel it daily!


Happy 4th of July!


Lots of Love,


Amber